Donald Trump now says he won't be driving the Pace Car at the Indy 500 because , “Time and business constraints make my appearance...impossible to fulfill.” So what will the Trump be doing on Sunday, May 30th , instead?
A) Tracking down Obama's high school home room teacher...and having her killed by a crack a team of Old Navy sales clerks.
B) Firing whatever idiot suggested he run for President.
C) Having his ego re-inflated.
D) Recovering from that six story fall off his ego.
E) Enjoying a picnic while a flunky explains what Memorial Day memorializes.
F) Removing the White hoods from all his Snuggies.
G) Beginning his campaign to have every unflattering word that rhymes with Trump removed from the Trump dictionary – beginning with “Strump”, “Slump”, “Dump” and “That-ego-maniac-jackass-Donald- Trump.”
H) Laying the groundwork for his cover story – he was actually kidding / doing the President a favor / mocking the Republicans / he actually won the election already but want to take the pay cut.
I) Hiring more over-the-hill actors and “reality” celebrities to genuflect at his feet for fifteen or twenty minutes.
J) Re-reading his book, “Rich people are so much smarter than poorer peoples”
K) Collaborating on his his new book, “You too can turn $35 million into $5 million by making a public ass out of yourself”
L) Selling his reputation on E-bay.
M) Riding Gary Busey like he was a unicycle.
N) Minutely examining his naval.
O) Something so important that youse could never imagine, because, yo, youse are not as smart as he is.
A) Tracking down Obama's high school home room teacher...and having her killed by a crack a team of Old Navy sales clerks.
B) Firing whatever idiot suggested he run for President.
C) Having his ego re-inflated.
D) Recovering from that six story fall off his ego.
E) Enjoying a picnic while a flunky explains what Memorial Day memorializes.
F) Removing the White hoods from all his Snuggies.
G) Beginning his campaign to have every unflattering word that rhymes with Trump removed from the Trump dictionary – beginning with “Strump”, “Slump”, “Dump” and “That-ego-maniac-jackass-Donald- Trump.”
H) Laying the groundwork for his cover story – he was actually kidding / doing the President a favor / mocking the Republicans / he actually won the election already but want to take the pay cut.
I) Hiring more over-the-hill actors and “reality” celebrities to genuflect at his feet for fifteen or twenty minutes.
J) Re-reading his book, “Rich people are so much smarter than poorer peoples”
K) Collaborating on his his new book, “You too can turn $35 million into $5 million by making a public ass out of yourself”
L) Selling his reputation on E-bay.
M) Riding Gary Busey like he was a unicycle.
N) Minutely examining his naval.
O) Something so important that youse could never imagine, because, yo, youse are not as smart as he is.
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